my big lesbian slumber party
How I conceptualized and directed Bored During Sex; a new one woman show written and performed by the incredible Gabi D’Amico.
“Pin The Clothes On Gabi” made by me!
I first saw Bored During Sex as a staged reading. Gabi and I had already known each other from past productions and quickly recognized the insane potential we held as collaborators. The staged reading was filled with so much joy, cultivated by just Gabi’s words and minor movements. I was teeming with ideas, knowing that, like me, most of the audience there would absolutely DEVOUR a fully staged production of this play. About a year later, here we are!
What started as an “are we doing this? i think we are doing this?” conversation, quickly snowballed into a “holy sh*t we are doing a show!” celebration by the grace of Gabi and her entire community. While Gabi took the producorial reigns, I quickly set to work on my Pinterest board...
Bored During Sex is a show about sex in all its forms, pleasurable and painful. It’s also solely based on Gabi’s life; and while Gabi’s experience is unique, she never once alienates her audience. Her writing is an incredibly honest recount of the threesomes and relationships she’s had in an effort to discover more about herself. When Gabi tells her stories, she bestows the audience with the role of her best friend. She decides what you know but she also can’t keep a secret from you. The audience becomes her closest confidant. The show is so intensely vulnerable and often teetered between uncomfortable silence and raucous laughter. I found so much joy in that. This concept of mirroring the reality of sex and intimacy in the pattern and tone of our show.
Gabi and I talked a lot about how the idea of balance played a part in this show. How pleasure and pain impacted her body and soul. The closer she was to her authentic self, the more balanced and grounded she became. She was rooted and swayed with confidence, glee, and delight. The moments where she was out of balance occurred when she recounted her past experiences with the men that assaulted or harmed her. She became stiff, in a way where one gust of wind could knock her over and break her. These moments of being off balance contradicted the fully realized Gabi we saw who was loud, passionate, and full of energy and movement. By the end, Gabi had reached a point where the scales were fluctuating. Her movements became less erratic and steady. Yet she wasn’t afraid of being still because her stillness was a part of her, her pain was a part of her. The show wasn’t just about sex, it was about Gabi’s relationship to sex and her undiluted view of intimacy.
We knew this show was a slumber party. In its intimacy and joy, the natural choice was to have the show mimic a fun sleepover with games and secrets. The pre-show consisted of people playing “Pin the Clothes on Gabi” and filling out “Erotic Madlibs” on the backs of their programs (there was also free wine?!). We wanted people to have fun. It was the slumber party where you talked about the boys you liked and pretended to kiss them on a pillow. Or it was the one where you sang too loud past bedtime and got in trouble by your friends mom. It was the slumber party where your friend passively shared an uncomfortable experience, and it stuck with you all these years later. It was the slumber party where you let yourself think, “I wonder what it’s like to kiss a girl?” and then maybe you did.
promotional photos taken by yours truly ;)
In the matter of about 8-weeks we had an impactful show, a fabulous space, and an incredible amount of support. Gabi and I had been dreaming for a while on how to make this show happen. As emerging artists, the number one challenge we face is finding space to make our art. For us, this meant rehearsing in my oddly-sized living room, but we knew that it wouldn’t work as a performance space. Luckily for us, Gabi has an amazing community of friends like Gia and Sarah at Mnemonic Coffee who shared their resources and hooked us up with Angie at Lovesick Chapel (you guys totally rock!). I couldn’t be prouder of all the work we did to make this show happen.
We are hoping this show happens again somewhere. Maybe Moxie or Diversionary? (whaaaatttt who said that?!) Maybe we will just remount it ourselves? Who knows honestly. All I know, is that it was really, REALLY empowering to collaborate with people in the community to make a good show happen and that emerging artists deserve to have their work seen.